You are addicted to Red Dwarf. It is my personal opinion that you are a hopeless case.

You believe that god made stupid people because there are so many.

RED DWARF TWERPS are a source of cruel amusement to you.

You will not admit this in public, but you have also secretly written your own Red Dwarf episode(s) and are currently plucking up the courage to submit them to the very reverend Doug Naylor.

You believe that the gene pool could use a little chlorine.

You can’t believe how long it’s taken the characters to get some ‘skin’.

You find that it is lonely at the top, but you eat better.

You like to call feminists ‘cute’

You are either celibate or a committed family man/woman.

If you had a walk on part you would want to play a Hologram

You are highly intelligent but a bit stupid when it comes to common sense.

You drive far too fast to worry about cholesterol.

People like you, but they think you’re a bit of a Geek.

You have a good career but you do not own a large house or flash car.

Other Red Dwarf fans look up to you.

You are a mine of information and you should be careful not to become the ‘party bore’ or patronising.

RED DWARF SAD GEEZERS admire your commitment although you secretly admire their social skills and in particular, the way members of the opposite sex are all over them.

You have recently sent an email message to the BBC reporting an inconsistency in one of the episodes.

Some people call you Mr Spock – this really annoys you.